Obama Should Tap His Inner Angry Black Man to End Gridlock

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(The Root) --  Government is shut down. Some 800,000-plus human beings are being furloughed or ordered to work without pay as we speak. And if Washington, D.C., fails to reach a debt-ceiling compromise in two weeks, the globe could be on the verge of an economic meltdown unlike anything history has ever seen.

Just another hot-mess apocalypse brought to you by, amazingly, a slick-haired band of fewer than three dozen rural, rednecky Republicans locked in a rinse cycle of Green Acres reruns. Mad yet? Even Republicans, like Long Island, N.Y., brawler Rep. Peter King, are fuming pink red and calling fellow Republicans names.

But if you managed to block out every slice of news-cycle noise and just let President Obama tell it, you would think you'd just won a Groupon deal for a free yoga class.

Most Americans get the president's penchant for being the calm in the storm. Fine; honey tastes better than vinegar. It's his signature cool-pose style, half engineered as a way to always stand above the fray, Zen sharpened and carefully chiseled in an effort to completely blast long-standing stereotypes of angry, militant black men on a marathon head stomp.