Judge Frees Terrorist-in-Training Because Whiteness Is a Helluva Alibi

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Even though the man was a member of one of the most dangerous terror communities in the country; despite the fact that he knew how to make bombs; with the knowledge that he was in possession of bomb-making materials; even after he exhibited every single trait of what law-enforcement officers, Homeland Security experts and Army investigators describe as “America’s biggest threat to national security”—a federal judge released neo-Nazi Brandon Russell on bond Friday, because the judge says that he saw no evidence that Russell was a danger to anyone.

But mostly because Russell was white.

I do not have a desire to be white. It looks too constraining, the food is too mayonnaise- and mustard-based, and I have grown fond of clapping on the beat. However, after looking at cases like the saga of Brandon Russell, even though I am a proud, unapologetic man of African descent, I am comfortable enough in my blackness to admit one thing:

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Being white must be amazing!

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