The Steamiest Details From James Comey's Prepared Trump Testimony

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James Comey, the former head of the FBI, will be testifying before the Senate Intelligence Committee on Thursday about his interactions with President Donald Trump. Ahead of that hearing, the committee has released his opening statement, which is full of saucy little details of illicit one-on-one conversations and flaunted protocol. The whole thing reads like a Victorian romance novel, garnished with spy thriller jargon. I’m getting the vapors already.

Take, for example, Comey’s visit to Trump Tower on January 6:

I remained alone with the President Elect to brief him on some personally sensitive aspects of the information... The IC leadership thought it important, for a variety of reasons, to alert the incoming President to the existence of this material, even though it was salacious and unverified... We also agreed I would do it alone to minimize potential embarrassment to the President-Elect

Salacious! Unverified! Is anyone else’s bodice feeling tight? Presumably this president-elect left quite the impression on our handsome young FBI director:

I began to type it on a laptop in an FBI vehicle outside Trump Tower the moment I walked out of the meeting. Creating written records immediately after one-on-one conversations with Mr. Trump was my practice from that point forward. This had not been my practice in the past.

Then there was the dinner Comey and Trump shared on January 27 where their tryst really heated up:

He had called me at lunchtime that day and invited me to dinner that night, saying he was going to invite my whole family, but decided to have just me this time, with the whole family coming the next time. It was unclear from the conversation who else would be at the dinner, although I assumed there would be others. It turned out to be just the two of us, seated at a small oval table in the center of the Green Room.

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